Life – ?
Song of the week: Someday – Sugar Ray
So my grandfather died Friday night. Haven’t really heard anything else about what’s going on because my (extended) family lives in Korea, but yeah. Liver cancer. I had a conversation over the ever-so-convenient AIM with a friend about how I felt. I dunno. Should I feel this way? I’ve lived most of my life in the US and when I did live in Korea, I never really saw my grandpa that much. Kind of a distant figure, but you know, still close I guess.
Me: i’m not really that sad right now
Me: i feel kinda detached from everything
Me: so yeah
Friend: yech I know that feeling
Me: i’ve been feeling that way for a while
Friend: since when?
Me: lol idk
Me: a year maybe
Friend: wow
Me: idk
Friend: lol I felt the same way actually, since the beginning of sophomore year
Friend: everything changed the first day we went back to school this year
Friend: like I don’t even know how to describe it man
Me: haha
It’s weird, there’s no connection between me, my thoughts, and the “real world”.
Me: grr but seriously
Me: school
Friend: I can’t even relate man
Me: is making my life a living dream
Me: and by dream
Friend: nightmare
Me: i mean like it feels like i’m not even awake
Me: not a good or bad dream
Me: just
Friend: hahaha
Me: a dream
Friend: that’s painful
Me: yeah
Me: so basically
Me: in a day in my life
Me: if i do something iwant to do
Me: then that means that i don’t get enough sleep
Friend: O-o
Me: which means i fall asleep in class
Friend: hahaha
Me: which means it takes longer to do hw
Me: which means i have less time to do what i want
Me: which means i have less time to sleep
Me: etc etc
Me: weekends = salvation
I thought I had narcolepsy, but it might just be the lack of sleep or too much stress (I got the flu twice this season), or a combination of both. I just hope that this is a phase.However, the thing I like about me is (yes, I know, so conceited) is that I can still be happy (I haven’t decided if this is only on the outside or on the inside too). Ask anyone, I’ll laugh 99.9% of the days that I’m not sick. Or joke, or whatever. It’s just me
be jealous.
